Pornography culture - differences in men and women

This is a post requesting comments!

I hear a lot of people saying that porn is normal, natural, and not a big deal.  Men are visually stimulated, and women are emotional, so just deal with it.  Well, I think that's a lame excuse.  Since when are women NOT also visual?  I appreciate and am turned on by the look of a sexy man just as much as any man is by a sexy woman.

I think the reality is that men like novelty.  It's not that they are visual.  If that were the case, they could have an album of racy photos of their significant other (or having that person actually in the room) and that would suit them just fine.  They wouldn't need anything else.  But internet porn brings constant novelty- a new girl at every mouse click.

Watch this great TED talk for more on that novelty and the effect it has:
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Now I want to talk about inequality.  I read an article this week by a sex therapist about how to talk to your boyfriend about their porn habit.  This therapist was someone who believes porn is fine, and you can never get a man to give it up.  I think she's full of crap.  She mentioned that asking him to give it up would be like asking you (the woman) to give up your vibrator and masturbation altogether.  (In my mind I am thinking, uhhh...wouldn't you give that up anyway cause you have a sexual partner?  Guess that's "old fashioned".)  Then she goes on to mention that a lot of men don't like women using vibrators because it sets up "unreasonable expectations".  :-o  Oh my, I had to just laugh so hard!  What do you think PORN is doing, genius??!!  For men, they get their unreasonable expectations from movies, media, and porn.  For women, theirs come from romance novels and movies (including Disney movies and other fairy tales), and vibrators.

Am I the ONLY person in this world that believes that we should be weeding all of these things out of our lives?!  How about for the sake of a healthy, loving relationship, neither partner has any sexual activity outside of their partnership?  And yeah, I am including self-stimulation, toys, and porn in the category of "sexual activity outside of the partnership".

Is there a way to screen people you date to find out if they are addicted to or indulge regularly in pornography?  I am sick and tired of every person I date being deep into this, and having my heart ripped out when I realize that their problem was worse than I thought, or that they aren't as recovered as I thought, or that they don't actually WANT recovery or aren't ready for it.  I would LOVE to have a way to weed guys out on the first couple dates so I don't even get involved with them.  Porn is a total deal-breaker (and heart-breaker) to me, so I want none of it.  I'm sick of this world.

Sex Trafficking- a rant

I never use this term cause it's dumb, but it's actually appropriate now.  WTF?!!!??  I just went to a symposium on slavery and sex trafficking at UVU.  (http://www.uvu.edu/sei/events/slavery_symposium/) Oh my gosh!  Are you kidding me?  What is going on here?  This world is so disgusting!  There's not an extreme enough word to describe how debased, horrible, and evil some people are.
The first shocker...  some people (ie refugees from other countries) are actually being kidnapped and robbed of their ORGANS to sell piecemeal to the highest bidders.

Then on sex trafficking, I'm afraid I actually swore out loud at the symposium when they showed this.  In Portland, people can "rent" a 10-year-old kid for the weekend, no questions asked.  OH MY GOD, WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE???!!!!!!!  (Not taking my God's name in vain here, but literally crying out to Him.)  I want to gather up every child and lock them somewhere safe!  This is so depraved and disgusting, I can't bear it.

How much of the pornography that YOU look at do you think is actually fully consensual?  People are being trafficked for prostitution and pornography all over the place.  And because we love and revere pornography so much, here's an interesting loophole...  prostitution is illegal in most places, so if you take one of those trafficked prostitutes and pay them for sex, you're committing a felony.  But, take that same person, FILM the sex and post it as pornography, pay them as a porn "performer" and guess what? It's legal!!!!  WTF again!!!???!!!

When will we see that Pornography is EVIL and needs to be done away with?!?  This really is the worst drug, evil people are making loads of money off it at everyone else's expense, and if YOU still think that watching porn on your own time does not hurt anyone....PLEASE stop lying to yourself.  You're hurting real people, even if you won't admit that it's hurting yourself (which it is), you do NOT know that the "performers" you're watching aren't actually trafficked individuals having their lives destroyed through constant rape and abuse, their families' lives threatened, etc.  Take away the demand and the supply would subside.  BOYCOTT PORNOGRAPHY!!!!